Thursday, June 30, 2011
Why I Am Not A Teenage Mom. (Rated PG)
News of pregnancy of beauty and feminine products and prime time actress, Andi Eigennman, surfaced out. Her mother, veteran actress, Jaclyn Jose, has already confirmed it. Her daughter is 18 weeks and 2 days pregnant at 21 years of age.
Through this, RH Bill is back on track. And people who approve of it is seriously pushing for the passing of said bill. With all the news of STD' cases and unwanted teenage pregnancy rampaging all over, I am not surprise.
But seriously, do we need the government to help protect us in deciding on doing what we already know isn't suppose to happen to us if we only stop for little while and think?
I'm not going to be holier than though person and tell you that I'm all saint that's why I'm not a teenage mother. No, definitely not. I have my fair share of being a rowdy teenager and dating men who wanted nothing but to get into my pants or skirt, despite me not having the lushest of body or anything. If I list them all down now, 24 hours isn't enough. I would probably need a week.
But what got me through those times my hormones were raging and my heart and other parts of my body seem to overcome my brain was my deep fear for my mother.
It's no news that I was very close to my mother and its no news that I was a difficult child. I ran away, tried different bad things, my parents got called several times to the principal's office and almost didn't graduate third year high school. I had those "peer pressure" moments, made out with a guy at the back of the school and had boyfriends really young. I even called myself once, a sexual being. I did try a lot of different things at a really young age.
But seeing how my mom suffered from work and how hard times and money were for us, made me realize that if I succumbed to all the sexual tensions and got pressured by my friends who are doing it, I know that I will just add to my mom's sufferings. I was already more than she could take and I couldn't afford to add more trouble for me.
There were times when I would look at my mom and wish that she would just stop with what her doing and rest. But she couldn't since bills came every month and I was studying in an expensive school with an expensive course. I wasn't doing that well in school, too, and I was scared to give her more than she could take.
Most of all, my mom instilled in me ambition. She said that not everyone is lucky to survive teenage pregnancy and have a great life. Not everyone is strong enough. And she didn't want me to take a chance because I may not be that tough after all. Not with how much money she was making, we certainly can't afford another mouth to feed.
She instilled in me dreams of going to Europe, having expensive things, living in my place... that if I go get pregnant, I should have most if not all of those things already. She instilled in me that she isn't capable of giving me all life's luxuries and that only my education is the only thing she can leave me. She also told me that she wouldn't have anything to do me when that happened because I have seriously disappointed her and threw out everything she taught me. Seriously, with the hundred of times she told me that, I believed her.
I think most parents do what they can to protect their children and shelter them from all life's monsters. But there will come a time that WE should take charge and make our own decisions. Whatever education we have, we are children of our parents and I think its time we look into their lives. How do they pay their bills, buy our cellphones, pay for our school and our leisure. It's time to ask what they expect from us and do what we can to achieve it.
I know how it is to be in love and to prove that love in whatever way we can. I know how it feels to want to tear yourself away from your man and just be one with him. Damn sure, I know how all those feelings. But Bill or no Bill, we should know that every action has an equal reaction. Most importantly, you and boyfriend are not the only person in the world. And most likely, he's not going to be the last man on earth. Not everything is about romance. And not everything if about just getting off and feeling that oh-so fantastic orgasm.
So before you do the deed... think of yourself first ten years from now. Think of your first dream of who to become when you grow old. Think of your parents or guardian. Think of the consequences first, please. Since I cannot go into details of how I was able to survive those years without having to succumbed to teenage pregnancy or drugs, I'm sure you have the right tools and teachings from your school and parents and even friends to help you do the right things.
Everything can wait... I cannot express how true this is. I am a living attestation on that.
I admire women who were able to become a magnificent mother despite the fact of having to deal with it in such young age. Sometimes, I find myself envying them because now I won't have my mom to be there when that happens. But I was glad I didn't have to let my mom go through with that.
Remember that MTV series 16 and Pregnant? That everyone in the family becomes involve when there's someone pregnant at such an early age? It's true. I've seen it. Imagine if I let my mom go through all the things with her hypertension and all... seriously, I would have killed her earlier. And with how difficult times are now these days, please think before you let another being into this world.
But if it really can't be helped... please use protection. So, if you're a teenager... please please think before you "do". Yes, pun intended.
Most of all, we are a God-fearing nation. Ask for His guidance when you think you can't think anymore.
Disclaimer: I am not judging teenage moms out there and cannot presume to know the difficulties or the joy of it. Like I said, I admire those women who were able to become good parents despite at such a young age. I am just sharing my two cents and experience on this subject and I hope that with this post, I can open a troubled teenager's mind out there to think before they act. So please refrain from unnecessary mean comments. Thank you.
Photo credit here.
Photo credit here.